interviews: on the couch with E
taken from NME, 28 november 1998

What song describes you best?
"Sexy MF by Prince"

What is heaven?
"It's a place in the sky where all the good people go when they die. Haven't you heard?"

What is hell?
"It's a place underground where all the bad people go and burn. Don't you know?"

What's your earliest memory?
"Sucking on the teat of....oh my God! Who was that man?!"

What's your greatest fear?
"That there will be a tomorrow."

What's your greatest talent?
"Moonwalking. I've been moonwalking since 1980, and I'm pretty sure Michael Jackson ripped me off."

Who is your greatest hero?
"Andy Kaufman (Latka from '70s US sitcom Taxi), because he was the greatest artist of the century."

What's the worst trouble you've been in?
"When I wore a dress to high school. It wasn't that I wore a dress, they were mad because it didn't match the school's dress-code colours. They sent me home, for a long time."

Who was the first love of your life?
"Mommy" 

Upon whom would you most like to exact revenge? Why? How?
"Marilyn Manson. He's got tits on his new CD cover and he's totally ripped off our drummer Butch, 'cos Butch had tits when tits wern't cool. I just want to expose to the world that his tits were stolen from Butch.”

What's your most prized possession?
"My pack of Nelson bubblegum. No, it's not - it's my Meat Loaf promotional condom. No, it's not that either - out tourbus was Ozzy Osbourne's tourbus before us, and I found a bottle of holy water blessed by Ozzy. It actually says on the label 'personally blessed by Ozzy'. It's on my mantle."

What have you most regretted doing while drunk?
"I had sex with nine sailors once. Boy, was that a mistake."

What can you cook?
"I make a pretty rockin' bowel of oatmeal."

What's the best peice of advise you've recieved?
"Don't start by eating the soup in the middle of the bowl, it's too hot. It's very good advise if you think about it. You should start with the soup on the perimeter of the bowl and work your way in."

Can you read music?
"No."

If you were invisible for a day, what would you do?
"I don't know, I feel pretty invisible already - that's the problem. But I'd probably get in a car and drive around London so that I could watch people scream, 'Crikey! There goes a car with one of those invisible guys driving it!'"

What are your final three wishes?
"One would be for Andy Kaufman to come out and admit that he's alive, and two and three I would just throw away."